omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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