yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Randomize
