Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
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