Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Randomize
