My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Randomize
