were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
Bring me that man meat
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Your penis caused this!
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