Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
