im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
