It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Randomize
