I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize