Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Randomize
