he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
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