You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
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