I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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