They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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