goodnight i made you a song goodbye
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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