we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
