I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
