so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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