My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize