Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
