You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Randomize
