Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize