just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
