How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Randomize
