You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
