did you get engaged???
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Randomize
