Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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