He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
