I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Randomize
