Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
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