I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
