if you like me you must not know who I am
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
My pussy is not your playground.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize
