I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
