Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Girls should come with a carfax report
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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