It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
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