just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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