I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
