made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Randomize
