i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Did we literally take a cab across the street
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Randomize
