susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize