We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
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