Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
