So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize