Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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