it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
