R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize