Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Randomize
