so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
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