Heybabeimwearingurpanties
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
