No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
you had me at cake vodka
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
