She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
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