it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
Randomize
