What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
Randomize
